


Residual

by Bitenomnom



Series: Mathematical Proof [35]
Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: A Scandal In Belgravia, A Study in Pink, Friendship/Love, Gen, Johnlock goggles optional, Laundry, M/M, Mathematics, Repetition, Slice of Life, The Blind Banker, The Great Game, The Hounds of Baskerville, The Reichenbach Fall
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-11-08
Updated: 2012-11-08
Packaged: 2017-11-18 05:30:51
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,571
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/557418
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bitenomnom/pseuds/Bitenomnom
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In John’s laundry basket, one would find one yellow-stained jumper (a victim of Sherlock’s artistic phase), one currently unstained jumper, one currently unstained pair of jeans, one pair of perfectly white pants, one pair of socks that were fine except a hole in the toe of one, and a gun, wrapped up in one of the jumpers, apparently to be hidden from someone.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Residual

**Author's Note:**

> This was another one of those things where I had a mathier idea but the story ran away...but I think I'm fine with that, this time. (So, essentially, enjoy a math lesson and an almost entirely unrelated story. XD Though I'd like to think the title applies in multiple ways...) 
> 
> Also, thank you to [JunkenMetel](http://archiveofourown.org/users/JunkenMetel/pseuds/JunkenMetel) for inadvertently putting the idea for this in my head ages ago (in a general sense, anyway). Bet you didn't think that laundry comment was actually going to come back to haunt you, did you?
> 
> As it says on the tin: Johnlock goggles optional.

Since there are so many pictures, today’s math is brought to you by the letter [R](http://www.r-project.org/). I mean, is brought to you in PDF form. (R is the name of the program we use in this stats class. It's free and really neat, so if you're into stats and don't know about R, you should check it out!) You may view it [here](https://docs.google.com/open?id=0B3RtdwVzbWiWRW8zdU9tOFozLW8), on Google Docs. Note that the concepts covered here are essentially an expanded-upon, pretty-pictures version of what's in [Visual Verification](http://archiveofourown.org/works/555988).

 

Also please note that what I go through in that document is essentially exactly what we did in class today, so proper credit to my professor for presenting it in that fashion.

 

***

I.

            If one were to step into 221B Baker Street, over Sherlock’s half-unpacked boxes and stacks of papers and microscope slides still piled high, if one could manage to avoid tripping on Sherlock’s violin case on the way into his room, if one could manage to avoid getting caught in a conversation with Mrs. Hudson about telling Sherlock to find a bloody flatmate to help keep him in check (because she’s _seen_ how he carries on and she _knows_ already it’ll be an absolute mess and she’ll never say so to Sherlock but he _needs_ somebody there, because she saw how he was, at the tail-end of shaking off his habit, and nobody ought to have to go through that twice), one could find Sherlock’s laundry basket.

            In Sherlock’s laundry basket, one would find a dress shirt and a pair of black trousers, a pair of black socks, and some silky navy pants.

 

            If one were to step into 221B Baker Street six days later, and somehow not get distracted looking over John’s shoulder as he types in his blog about colors of mobile phones and suitcases, one could go upstairs to John’s room and find his laundry basket.

            In John’s laundry basket, one would find one jumper, one shirt, one pair of trousers, one pair of socks, and one pair of pants.

 

 

 

II.

            If one were to step into 221B Baker Street and somehow maneuver around the six different cans of yellow spray paint scattered across the floor without bumping into Sherlock as he shakes a seventh and points it at the wall, if one put off searching to see if any _other_ parts of the flat had already been so decorated, if one crept very, very quietly past John sleeping on his arms over an open newspaper on the kitchen table, one could get back to Sherlock’s room and find his laundry basket again.

            In Sherlock’s laundry basket, one would find two dress shirts—one splattered rather badly with yellow paint. One would also find two pairs of trousers, two pairs of black socks, two pairs of silky pants—but not for long, as Sherlock would soon realize that they had also been covered in splattered paint that rubbed off from the dress shirt, and bin them all.

 

            If one then marched up the stairs to John’s room (quietly), one could find his laundry basket, too.

            In John’s laundry basket, one would find one yellow-stained jumper (a victim of Sherlock’s artistic phase), one currently unstained jumper, one currently unstained pair of jeans, one pair of perfectly white pants, one pair of socks that were fine except a hole in the toe of one, and a gun, wrapped up in one of the jumpers, apparently to be hidden from someone.

 

 

 

III.

            If one were to step into 221B Baker Street (and quite rudely, really) late at night and manage not to wake John, fast asleep on the sofa while bright flashes of an action film reaching its climax played across his slack features, one might also manage to avoid the attention of Sherlock, perched in his chair, eyes fixed on John, Moriarty’s replica of the pink lady’s phone turning endlessly in his hands, _no, no, no_ (or was it _oh, oh, oh_?) outlined endlessly by his lips, one could once more rifle through his laundry basket.

            In Sherlock’s laundry basket, one would find an aubergine dress shirt and a pair of black slacks, black socks and silk pants. One would find a bright orange blanket resting halfway in the basket, perhaps halfheartedly thrown into the room tonight and not yet properly sorted. Perhaps it was not intended to go into the basket; but perhaps its thrower wanted to think it was, or was considering giving it away, or burning it, or experimenting on it, but would, in just half an hour, retrieve it and tuck it around John’s shoulders on the sofa, and put it to practical use.

 

            One could then rest in Sherlock’s bed, because Sherlock wouldn’t be using it tonight anyway, would perhaps stay awake or perhaps doze off in his chair in the sitting room. The next morning (or afternoon, if one was so inclined) one could stop by John’s room.

            In John’s laundry basket, one would find four jumpers, four shirts, four pairs of trousers, four pairs of pants, and three pairs of socks. One would not find the fourth pair in the laundry basket; one would find that one in the trash (hole in the toe). One would also not find an orange blanket in the laundry basket; that would be draped over the bottom of the bed. If one reached into the basket to filter through its contents, one would feel the cold damp of one of the shirts, sheeted in sweat from the night before.

            If one were observant enough to notice John walk into the room one would back away from the basket quickly, as it would soon be full of John’s foot.

            “Augh!” he would say, and, “Christ!”  He would kick the basket off and gather the spilled-over contents back into it, pausing at the damp shirt. He would put the thing back on and stare at the orange blanket as he buttoned it. He would set his gun on the table beside his bed, and not inside a jumper in the laundry basket.

 

 

 

IV.

            If one were to step into 221B Baker Street, one might feel a little awkward wandering into Sherlock’s room, as one would note the presence of an individual who was neither Sherlock nor John, but rather a woman, The Woman, lying in Sherlock’s bed. One could, nonetheless, observe Sherlock’s laundry basket, and she would likely feign sleep while one did.

            In Sherlock’s laundry basket, one would find two pairs of black trousers, two pairs of silky pants, four pairs of socks, four button-up shirts, two pairs of white pants, and two jumpers.

            In John’s laundry basket, one would find nothing.

 

 

 

V.

            If one were to step into 221B Baker Street and could manage not to trip over the bloody _bloody_ harpoon that _someone_ still hadn’t moved somewhere or cleaned or bothyet, and also not trip on the limbs of one Sherlock Holmes, sprawled all over and halfway off the sofa while he slept, if one perhaps turned a blind eye to the way John was eyeing various of Sherlock’s experiments on the table as he made himself a cup of tea and Sherlock a very spiteful cup of coffee, one could go into Sherlock’s room again, if one hadn’t had enough of that yet.

            In John and Sherlock’s laundry basket, one would find six jumpers, eight shirts, ten pairs of trousers, fourteen pairs of socks, and eleven pairs of pants. Well: one would find some of those in the laundry basket, and some of them spilled over the laundry basket. Beside the laundry basket, one would find to recently emptied suitcases. One might be able to dig through the pockets of all the trousers and run into a receipt from an inn for a room with two single beds. If one happened to be facing Sherlock’s bed at just the right angle while holding this receipt, one could look at the receipt while also pondering from the faint imprints on the bed whether both beds in the inn were even used. One might conclude that Sherlock’s legs would be far too long for that to be comfortable; one might conclude that Sherlock was used to sleeping curled up tight anyway; one might conclude that late at night, deep in the dark in the country with gaseous fear in one’s nostrils and lungs and brain, one might find warmth and company a greater comfort than leg-room.

 

 

 

VI.

            If one were to step into 221B Baker Street, over John’s half-packed boxes and stacks of violin music and microscope slides all put away to be donated, if one could manage to avoid tripping on John’s cane on the way to Sherlock’s room, if one could manage to avoid getting caught in a conversation with Mrs. Hudson about telling John that it’s fine if he wants to skip paying this month’s rent and just move out (because she’s _seen_ how he carries on and she _knows_ he’s an absolute mess and she’ll never say so to John but he _needs_ to be away from this, because she saw how he was, at the tail-end of their visit to his grave, and nobody ought to have to go through that every day), one could find Sherlock and John’s laundry basket.

            In Sherlock and John’s laundry basket, one would find one jumper, one shirt, one pair of trousers, one pair of socks, and one pair of pants.


End file.
